White’s of Henry Lane

I got an email back from Starbucks about my video card experience. They asked me to phone them up, which was good. However I had to go a couple of menus deep, wait on hold, then talk to the CSR, then answer a customer service satisfaction survey of at least half a dozen questions. For what? To confirm my address so they could send me a gift card.

Ah, well. That’s better than nothing, I guess.

There’s a Starbucks near my office that’s been open for a few months now but has yet to really get its act together. There are a couple of staff members who know what they’re doing, but far more who don’t. I’ll give you an example: just before Christmas I went in there on two separate occaisions to find that they had no coffee brewed.

Starbucks.

No coffee.

Of course, they don’t tell you that ’til you’ve handed over your twonie (or as I like to call it, a coffee token). And then you sit and wait, and they draw the coffee before the brewing is done and its really strong. Most annoyingly, though, they don’t give you those “Sorry we screwed up” free beverage cards. I can understand that, I guess. With the sheer volume of screw-ups at this location, they’d be broke in no time. I’m not a big complainer … no, that’s not true, I really am a big complainer, but I tend to do it in private. However, I’m not above writing Starbucks who trade on their customer service and the consistency of the coffee. I’ve written twice, and have hear nothing.

Today, however, took the cake. I went shopping for computer parts. Specifically the insanely afforable Sapphire Theatrix HDTV tuner card based off the ATI Theatre 550 pro core. I’m very excited. On the way back to the office with my little bundle of joy, I stopped off at this Starbucks, got a Grande Bold. Which the staff person knocked over, pouring it all over the counter, all down my leg, on my shoes, and most distressingly into the bag containing my tuner card. She apologized profusely, as she should have done. I worked at a coffee shop for a long time, and never ever did anything that close to boneheaded, but when you’re dealing with liquids these things happen. It was what happened next that really cheesed me off. She reused the cup that had been rolling around on the counter, did not refund my money, and did not offer me one of the sorry cards.

I left before I started shouting, which my wife says was a wrong move. I was very civil, despite a desire to use Strong Language. I’ve once again dashed off a letter to Starbucks this time using email, since comment cards get no response. We’ll see if they respond. Meanwhile, I’ve little option but to go to that Starbucks, since the next closest one is across six lanes of traffic and a TTC path. I guess I’ll just start wearing rain pants.

I get more email intended for Angela White and Anna White than I get for myself. These two clueless bimbos can’t seem to enter their own email address correctly to save their lives. They also seem to really fancy entering contests. As everyone but these chumps knows, all you win in these contests is a vat of spam. Anna’s friends also hate men, and send around all kinds of those “10 Reasons why a Sex in the City marathon is better than a man if you’re a misanthropic couch jockey” joke mails.

Angela, Anna, and whoever signed up for Match.com using my email with the username SteHutch, in case you’re reading this: start checking your email address when you enter it into forms and give it to your friends. Or better yet, please: get off the internet. There are too many idiots on it already.